John Oliver’s Hilarious Tips For Getting Out Of New Year’s Eve Celebrations

HBO’s John Oliver is not a fan of New Years Eve celebrations.

The host of Last Week Tonight posted a special video on YouTube knocking the overhyped annual extravangazas as “the worst” and compared it to the death of a pet: “You know it’s going to happen, but somehow you’re never truly prepared for how awful it is.”

New Year’s Eve “combines three of the least pleasant things to mankind,” Oliver says. “Forced interaction with strangers; being drunk, cold and tired; and having to stare at Ryan Seacrest for five solid minutes waiting for him to tell you what the time is.”

If you dread this time of year for your friends’ over-promising of a holiday doomed to always under-deliver, then you can probably empathize with Oliver’s critique. But have no fear, he also offers some solid tips for avoiding a night of boredom, agony, and/or disappointment.

“Honestly, the best thing you can do is avoid the whole evening,” he says, before offering advice for specific cases.

One example: Celebrating New Year’s Eve party at a friend’s house.

“Do you really want to sit on your friend’s sofa and watch hummus turn brown all night?” Oliver asks.

“No, nobody does.”

So, what do you do?

“Simply tell them you’re doing a cleanse,” Oliver says, pointing out that this excuse will work for anything. And it’s especially useful because there probably won’t be any follow-up questions.

Check out John Oliver’s video for more helpful tips to avoid people, not make friends, and skip celebrating this New Year’s Eve.

John Oliver’s Hilarious Tips For Getting Out Of New Year’s Eve Celebrations